I meant to write this post up directly after seeing Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald weeks ago and, to be entirely frank, I forgot all about it. That says a lot about my disappointment in the film and even more about our changing perspective on the Harry Potter phenomenon as a whole. Two years ago, Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find them released at my local theater and the line to get in—not to get tickets, those had been sold out days before—twisted down the theater’s massive steps,...

We’ve made it to the finish line, friends, and wow am I happy to get there. 

Let’s move through this as smoothly as we’re able. 

With everyone realizing that Voldemort and stupid time shenanigans are a legit threat now, an “Extraordinary General Meeting” is called at the Ministry, and I laugh because that doesn’t sound at all serious and ominous, it sounds like something from Kindergarten. “Class! Every day we have our normal meeting, but today there’s an EXTRAORDINARY meeting!” Bring out the mil...

(There will be four sections of this review, one for each Act. Part 1 and 2 are here. Spoilers and ranting below).

Well, my reviewing has somewhat slowed because my reading has also slowed—to a freaking crawl if I’m frank. I never thought I’d see the day where I had to force myself to read Harry Potter… yet here we are. 

Let’s get this over with. 

For all those who’ve forgotten (and it’s a seriously wonky plot so I wouldn’t blame you), we’re now in the third timeline, the one where Cedric is s...

(There will be four sections of this review, one for each Act. Part 1 is here. Spoilers and ranting below).

Well. I’ve finished Act 2 and…things have not gotten better.

They’ve gotten worse.

I’ll get to the plot in just a second, but for now let me just say that characterization is still a horrid mess. Even the characters that don’t appear get short changed. Neville—our brave, amazing Neville—is briefly mentioned by McGonagall as a good person to help them look for the missing Albus and Scorpius, b...

[A brief explanation of spork can be found here. An explanation of Throwback Thursdays is here. Also, obvious spoilers below] 

Given that this is Harry Potter, a phenomenon with more love poured into it than almost any other modern literary series—from myself most of all!—I feel the need to preface this review by saying a few things.

1. No, this isn't a recap. Rather this is a pure, responsive critique. You'll need a least a passing familiarity with Cursed Child's characters and plot to follo...